doubledollar | IC INBOX

My world was so far into the past we just had uh...horses, really. And carriages pulled by them. And the hot air balloon, I guess.

[But the Kingdom only had ONE of those and that belonged to the royal family. He considers this and nods. ]

Okay, that makes sense. I guess anyone's aim might be a little off if they're missing a limb. It'd put your centre of balance off totally.

[He grins, excited as he pulls out a very steampunk-looking prosthetic arm out of his backpack.]

Okay, but beeeeefore we do that, do you wanna give this a look? See-see if it fits you okay? I can always readjust and-

[He's clocked they have an observer, he slooooowly turns to look at the cottage.]

Um- Is he- is he okay?

[ Wolfwood is definitely just sitting in the windowsill with what looks like a really fat apple in his lap, cigarette held loose in his fingers. When Varian looks at him, he gives a little lazy salute with the cigarette-holding hand. ]

Ten points if you get him in the ass, Shorty!

Horses are one of the best means of travel. It's nearly the same where I come from. [ nearly. because they dont have horses, per se, but they do have bigass birds that are basically horses. he's gonna wave a hand about it, though, giving a little smile as Varian calls his aim off.

much like anyone else who sees his aiming dummies and their lack of vital-aimed shots, he doesn't bother to correct varian, and admit he'd been missing on purpose. he just beams at him with a little laugh in his throat.
coming over to where the younger man is fiddling around in his backpack--and his mood INSTANTLY changes when the guy brings out a full new arm--it definitely looks way different than what he's used to, but WOW, it's... stylish? with its little gears and lights, the visible copper wiring and studs--
He usually goes for a subtle look so people don't realise his arm is fake, but now the cat's out of the bag and this... this is just... ]

That is SERIOUSLY cool? Are you kdding me? You made this??
Okay, I was totally right to call you a genius.

[ he's gonna take it with his one good hand, looking it over with a wild little giggle in his throat. ]

--Seriously this is amazing, you made this in such a short time? [ he's going to shift to pull half his sweater off. ...might be exposing poor varian to those brutal scars along the left side of his body, but, he won't really pay much notice to it as he works on fitting it with whatever means varian designed on it to the metal plate at the bottom of his missing arm.

Lifting his head as the guy asks about wolfwood--and then wolfwood calls out. His expression goes deadpan. ]

He's fine. He's my roommate, he said he wanted to watch you shoot at me, so don't mind him.
He's not housetrained so he's best ignored.

Horses are held in pretty high regard in Corona. The second-in-command of the Royal Guard is a horse.

[Yup. A horse outranks most of the humans which...probably says a lot about the Coronan army.

Varian's just eating up all that praise, his smile widening at all that sweet, sweet validation. ]

Hah, it's no big deal. I once put together a whole transdimensional portal in like... a couple hours. I just wanted to make sure that this was exactly right, as it's got to be precise.

[He is not bothered by the scars, but he might be eyeballing them like the tiny bisexual disaster he is. He blushes a little, looking away respectfully. ]

But-but I figured that it might be an idea to see how it fits? I can make adjustments then so it's perfect.

[Varian raises a confused hand in greeting to Wolfwood anyway because it'd be rude not to.]

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, duly noted? [That was aimed at Wolfwood, before he turns back to Vash, not-so-stage whispering.] Is he...okay? He seems pretty keen about me actually hitting you?

They have a horse as a royal guard member? That must be one hell of a horse, damn. [ he chooses the positive option--that the horse is just really good at whatever it does and not that the rest of the army is... useless... ]

A... whole portal. To another dimension. [ yeah okay he's staring openly at this guy now. that's... amazing? that's honestly amazing. ] That sort of thing is borderline impossible where I'm from without a lot of power most people don't have so excuse me while I just.

[ yep he's continuing to fit the arm on--moving to lift it once he's done. As expected, he can't exactly move the fingers, but. It's... a good weight. It's the right length--and damn if it isn't fancy as hell. full view of the soft sort of relieved expression that moves over his face as he lifts it, turning his arm over so the fingers spread out due to gravity. ]

Weird that it's been almost two months and I almost forgot what it felt like to have weight like this on the other side.
[ he laughs, almost giddily as he looks up at varian. ] This is seriously some great work.

[ he glances at wolfwood, raising his new arm--giving him a very floppy-wristed wave. Stop being a feral creature over there. ] Don't worry about him, for real. He's just mad that he's never been able to hit me once in his life, that's all.

You know, gunmen and their pride at being a good shot...

Oh yeah. Maximus is a national hero! He's probably the best guard they ever had.

[No shade on Eugene, but Varian is pretty sure the only reason Max isn't captain is that it's a human position.

He chuckles, a touch embarrassed by Vash's awe. He's proud of both portals he managed to create...on an engineering standpoint. He's a little less proud of what happened with both of them. They ended up being a pretty big mess. ]

I built the original back home based on the designs of another inventor. But I did another one here it uh...didn't really end so well. I was trying to find a way to go home. If anyone tells you about dinosaurs showing up in the city, that's- that's on me.

[And he still carries a lot of guilt about that. Still, the praise over the arm cheers him up a lot.]

Yeah? Does it fit okay? Is it chafing or sticking anywhere?

[He turns his attention back to Wolfwood.]

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I get it. I guess you really are just that good at dodging, huh?

[ a horse who's the best guard they ever had. Vash really does have to LAUGH at that, an incredulous tone to his voice as he shakes his head. he's going to shift and move the arm again, stretching it out from his body to see if it pinches or catches on any part of itself as he does so. ]

I might have to wear it around a bit with my coat on for a bit to make sure it doesn't pinch or chafe a bit, so I'm not sure if you need to take it back to your -- lab? Wherever you made it? But so far, it's... man, I'm just excited about how cool it looks, if I'm gonna be honest.

[ but
oh no
now he's looking
directly at varian
as he talks
about dinosaurs.
a little twitch of his lip. ]

When I first got here I went on a whole rant to my buddy Waver about how Earth scientists got Dinosaurs wrong, because I'm from the 32nd century and the research is different now. But then I... helped break into the Zodiac building and got chased by some velociraptors...

[ he's gonna give such a crackling laugh. Those teeth were so real. ]

I'm really good, I'm tellin' you. I'm not uuuuuusually one to show off. [ a complete lie. ] But when it comes to this skill of mine, it's kind of really fun to watch people get exasperated with how--for all their years of training, they just can't catch me with even a stray shot.

Yeah, I've got a workshop by my house. But that's great! Just let me know how you get on with it, we can take it as it comes.

[He looks, surprised because it didn't occur to him that the scientists of THIS time still got dinosaurs wrong. They got them SUPER wrong in HIS century, but he would have expected better of a generation with electricity at their fingertips. ]

Wow, really? How wrong did they get them? [He'd heard of the velociraptors, and it was unsettling to know they had been actively dangerous to other people. Thanks for that, Zodiac. ] If it helps any, those ones were genetically created for a theme park so it's uh...probably not exactly accurate? I remember going into the realm they were from to fix the issue and they were mixed with like...amphibian DNA to create them. It probably made them look...different.

[He can't imagine it did much for ACCURACY after all.]

I don't blame you! If I could do that, I'd make it a party trick. It sounds like fun!

[Honestly more because of the MATH involved than anything else. ]

[ He gives the arm another little wiggle, before he's moving to stand up. Giving it a little swing at his side, shifting it up again as he starts to talk again, a dumb smile on his face. he'd missed the weight and feel of having an arm again, and he was a simple dog. simple things made him happy.

He's gonna lift his head up and give Varian a bit of a crooked grin. ]

Well, for firsts, they're way too big. Velociraptors that chased after me were huge, that's what made them terrifying. Actual raptors are like...

[ hes gonna use both hands to gesture a size, using one hand to adjust the other before completing the estimation. dog. dog sized. not even big dog size. ]

And they didn't hunt in packs, either. They were crazy independent. Being chased by like six of them? I was so annoyed. They're definitely a completely different species.
...Not to mention the lack of feathers...

[ hes gonna pick up his gun and holster it at his hip, which was sitting on a small table near the solar generator--as well as an odd looking ... limb of some sort.
there's a hand on the table, detached from it, as vash goes about fumbling with it--making it obvious that it actually has a ... gun of some sort attached to the wrist. ]

It'd be a great party trick in this world. I mostly used it back home to get bounty hunters off my butt. It's unbelievably disheartening to waste hundreds of dollars on bullets without a single one connecting.

[ he offers the broken off limb to varian. ]

Sorry, but this is the only other gun I have.
As I doubt you can lift Nico's gun, it's taller than you are.

[Varian listens, enraptured. Learning means SO MUCH to him, so ever new factoid is treated with care and wonder.]

Oh my god, right!! I've been looking into them and they were totally related to birds!! They SHOULD have had feathers. But people just decided on "giant lizard" and that's where they got stuck and it's so dumb. But that's fascinating! Thank you!

[Because you THANK PEOPLE for imparting knowledge! It's only polite!!]

Hah, wow, I bet it is! It'd make them frustrated, and frustrated people make mistakes. Their chances of hitting anything would significantly lower the more frustrated they get.

[He chuckles taking the limb, turning it this way and that.]

I made a gun back in Corona that was bigger than me, and I could fire that but it was...uh... unwieldy. This is a lot easier. How does it work?

Edited 2023-05-29 23:45 (UTC)

[ he doesnt expect to be thanked for something so small. reading up on dinosaurs and stuff was something him and his brother did back when they were a year old--looking about 11--and it was a subject that had completely bored Kni. He'd been more interested in the books about cowboys and the wild west, but... Vash can't help but to chuckle. Who knew reading such things would be useful to him now, almost a century and a half later? ]

I think it was just a lack of full knowledge and people's wild imaginations getting ahead of them. I don't personally see a problem with fairy-tale creatures, but seeing the things literally showing up and trying to take a bite out of my butt? I was so mad.

[ he'll laugh again, because he isnt actually mad now that it's over, even if its varians fault they showed up in the first place. eternally, he is a man who can see someone commit a war crime and then try to get them to just make better choices next time. ]

Sounds unwieldy.
That guy in the window also uses a gun that's bigger than him and its honestly ridiculous. But if you get good at it, I guess it's fine.
I've always been a fan of handheld firearms myself.

Can't say ive ever made one myself, though.
This is actually my old arm, my Sensei made it for me, and there was a hidden gun in it. I could fold my wrist down and get my finger over the trigger here--

[ he's gonna show varian the little loop at the bottom of the limb, where he'd removed the fake hand, so varian could instead hold it. ]

So all you do is pull that loop down. It's a pretty gentle trigger, just be careful holding it. Use one hand to pull the trigger, and the other hand to keep the body of the gun steady.
I've padded the broken end with some cloth and cotton so when it kicks back, it shouldn't hurt you.

It'll fire the same sort of rounds Peacebringer does--

[ he says, while patting the big colt .45 in its hip holster. ]

--So you have six shots to try to catch me with.

[ he grins. ]

Should I let you get some practice shots in first? I can reload it.

Hah, yeah. Suddenly being attacked by creatures who belong in story books is probably... a lot. The world I come from is kinda weird like that sometimes, but it's got nothing on Kaisou.

[No one's topped Rapunzel's hair yet, but he doesn't think anyone ever will. Not really. ]

It was, but it was the first of its kind and I kinda needed it to use a very specific, liquid projectile.

[That didn't work, which he's kinda glad for because holy shit, did he come close to killing Cass back then. He nods, listening to Vash's explanation of the gun.]

Man, that's really cool AND clever! You never know when you might need a weapon and having one...literally to hand at all times is a great way around it!

[He tests the weight of it, turning it this way and that, using that quick little mind of his to figure it out. He lets out a soft hmmmm.]

I might give it one try out first, just so I can get a feel of it.

I'm used to trouble like that, but usually it's just guys with guns, not. Firedogs and Giant lizards... it's still a big adjustment for me.
...There's a lot less trouble here though, so I'll take it, honestly.
I'll get rusty with my gun skill otherwise.

[ not that hes bothered by that. the idea that he doesn't have to shoot at people is a huge relief, honestly. ]

Liquid projectile, huh. Can't say I've ever had a gun like that. [ almostnkilling your current friends probably a rough thing to deal with dude, hes been there.

hes gonna wave, using his fancy new steampunk arm, to the half of the garden where hes got the small stack of haybales and target set up. ]

I'll reload it for you once you get a feel for it, then. Brace it with both hands, make sure the end is braced against your body so the kickback doesn't make you drop it, then just pull the trigger. Easy.

... I mean, getting shot at less had got to be better however you look at it, right? But yeah, enough weird stuff happens here that you should still get practice in.

[He grins, nodding.]

YEAH, it turned solid on contact, it made...well, an unbearable amber. It was only used for one person as a complete last resort.

[Because he has a whole shed-load of trauma around it, which is why he's never remade it. It can stay broken. He nods as he listens to Vash's instructions, turning to take aim at the target.]

Okay! Let's give this a shot. ...Pun intended.

[He braces the arm like he was told and carefully squeezes the trigger. It's definitely got less kickback than Project Obsidian had, but then it's not hucking liquid rock around. He doesn't hit the target, but he's not far off. He hums softly, before taking aim again, changing his stance a little, getting it RIGHT this time. He's...probably muttering math under his breath. He fires again, and this time it's a bullseye. He wasn't kidding when he said he had a good aim.

He glances over at Vash with a grin.]

This thing IS pretty cool.

Definitely better to have days full of peace, and there's definitely just slightly-chaotic-enough stuff happening in this world to keep me from getting rusty.

[ not to mention inviting acquaintances over to your cottage in the woods with the express purpose of shooting at you. honestly, he half accepted because he probably needs the practice. ]

Unbreakable amber... getting hit with that sounds rough. [ but then his face breaks out into a GRIN, moments later. ] --I love puns.

[ but now is time to watch Varian try the gun out. And... honestly? Honestly, he's impressed. Watching the barrel of that hidden gun shift and move with the subtlest of fixes, editing his first shot to amend it into a goddamn bullseye. On his second shot.

Colour vash impressed. Sure, it was done while aiming and standing still on an unmoving target, but. there are many people with their own guns who couldn't hit the broad side of a sand steamer for their second shot, even if it was standing still. ]

--Look at you! A bulls-eye on your second try?
Maybe Wolfwood should be worried after all, he's a spray-and-pray kind'a guy.

[ he winks. ]

Oh yeah, I don't think anyone's skills can be left to get rusty in this place. I don't think I remember a single quiet month since I got here.

[There's not even been a single quiet week, if he's honest. He shifts a little, because he'd rather not get into all that, because that would involve talking about some pretty large errors in his past he's not quite comfortable discussing with...well, most people yet.

Much better to just focus on the guns. That's a lot less of a discomforting subject to be in. He smiles, absolutely delighted with the praise.]

Aww, it wasn't that big a deal. I just needed to adjust for the right angle is all. It really is just math at the end of the day.

[And when your brain fires on as many cylinders at once like Varian does, it's an easy thing to figure out.]

Hah, I don't know, you're a moving target, it'll probably be different. He shouldn't have to worry YET.

That's both half reassuring and half terrifying, if I'm honest with you!

[ hahhaha what if he'd like a quiet month huh
well the last one wasn't bad, the biggest thing that happened was ... well, this, actually.
he still cant believe someone took up his half joke of "shoot at me". varian was a wild guy. ]

See, you get it. Math powers are legit powers, no matter what other people say to you when you bring it up.

[ he isnt coping at all, nope.

hes gonna take the arm gun from varian and pin it between his new fake arm and his side--take the moment to reload it so he has a full barrel again.

He's then going to hand it back, heft up his own gun--and go stand in front of that board full of drawn targets himself.

a bit of a grin on his face.
hes taking this way too easily for a guy about to get shot at probably? ]

I mean, I won't be a moving target.
Not until you pull the trigger.
It's kind'a hard to explain.

...You'll see in a second.
Take your time and seriously, don't hesitate. I got this, alright?

Thaaaaat's usually the mood people have. Yeah.

[Varian is a weird feral garbage child, which Vash can now learn for himself.]

RIGHT? My boyfriend thinks math is boring. His eyes glaze over when I talk to him about it and everything.

[He grins, excited about the prospect of shooting a guy like a weirdo. ]

I can't wait to see. Okay, here goes!

[Which is all the warning Vash gets before the kid fires off a shot at him.]

Math isn't boring, not when you get into it. You can solve almost anything by using different kinds of math. [ he sighs!!!! so dramatically, as if the very idea was exasperating.

he clicks the barrel of his own gun, making sure the thing was set to fire before laying his finger off the side of the trigger.

his head slowly lifting as Varian takes aim.
It's... honestly something he'll laugh about later, how little hesitation the man has about pulling the trigger at him.

As promised, Vash truly doesn't move at all when the bullet is fired.
It's quick. the way his eyes dance, taking in the angle of where varian is standing, the height of the gun.
where the bullet would hit, if its trajectory was uninterrupted.
the way his eyes flick to do a calculation is too fast for the human eye to track.

...as is how vash moves, or, really, his lack of any huge movement. he doesn't dive to the side or throw himself down onto the ground.
its like he shifts, maybe a few centimeters to the side with a half turn of his body. no wasted movement, and the bullet lodges a dark hole in the wood behind him, barely a few millimeters off where it would have gone through flesh and bone.

so quickly, varian may not have even registered how quickly he'd moved.

and he's still grinning like a goofy fool. ]

Oops, that sure was close.
Not quite on the money, though.

Exactly!! That's what I tell him all the time but he never believes me. I think he'd just rather solve all his problems with violence, which while impressive, can't fix everything, y'know?

[Which is a hilarious statement to make when he's literally shooting at a person. But there you go. Life's funny like that sometimes.

Varian is honestly amazed at how easily Vash dodged the literal bullet. He was PRETTY damn sure that would have hit the man dead on- he's not exactly a small target after all. He managed to dodge it anyway- Varian was expecting some wild dive out of the way, maybe a cool cartwheel!!! But nope. he just moved. Inches. And didn't get hit. ]

...That is so cool. You barely moved!!!

Edited 2023-06-08 19:28 (UTC)

[ claiming your partner solves everything with violence is hilarious given what theyre doing but vash might ALSO cut wolfwood a GLANCE as if accusingly, as if the man can hear them from where he is over in the house. ]

Yeah, tell me about it. [ varian isnt the only one with a close buddy like that.

but that's neither here nor there because he's feeling giddy. He didn't doubt himself for a second, of course, but there's always a bit of a bounce to the serotonin levels when he startles someone for the first time with this... odd skill of his. ]

Can't waste movements, what if there's five other guys shooting at me? I could probably do some cool flips or somethin' if I'm sure I ain't got three guns trained at me, but.

[ he grins. raising his own gun. ]

Five shots left.

[ when Vash oh so 'subtly' looks at Wolfwood, he flips him the bird, smirking as Varian takes a shot and whiffs--he doesn't look like he expected much else. Fritter has been shifted into his lap, and conspicuously, Wolfwood's hands are cupped around his lil'... head? As if to spare his little worm ears.

does he have ears? ]

You want me to give you somethin' to twirl about, Blondie?

[ and here, he taps his foot against the uh... big-ass, cloth wrapped cross leaning on the side of the house. ]

Edited 2023-06-10 01:46 (UTC)

OH, you get that too, huh?

[He casts a knowing look at the house- he gets you! Sometimes, sometimes you just love someone who likes to deal with their problems by punching them. It happens!]

I guess that makes sense- you can't really predict where all those bullets are gonna land.

[He glances over at Wolfwood and that...what the holy hell is that?]

...Is that a cross?

Edited (shh I can name) 2023-06-10 17:27 (UTC)

Sure do. It's a full-time job, isn't it.

[ talking about the priest like he's not even here. he's hanging out with his new buddy varian, okay, wolfwood, let him be cool! god. ]

You are NOT shooting that thing in the garden. Quit it.

[ he's gonna shake his new arm at him, as if to scold him, before looking at varian with a bit of a sheepish laugh. ]

I'm great at dodging, but it definitely gets a little complicated when it's more than one at a time.

...

And yeah, it's a cross. But it's not actually a cross. It's his bug stupid gun.

I didn't say I was gonna shoot it in the garden, I said I was gonna shoot it at you.

[ he takes another drag off his cigarette, looking terribly smug for someone who's not currently getting the Vash the Wiggleworm treatment, smirking as Varian comes into mental contact with Cross Punisher. ]

It's a cross and a gun. It's real full of mercy. I'd offer to let you try it out, but...

[ he gives Varian a once over, pity almost in his gaze for a moment. ]

You would probably get squashed trying to pick it up. No offense.

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tristamp icon bc i have so few appropriate trimax gun emotes

sneaks in real quick

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